Tuesday, April 17, 2012

And then my head exploded

I have a facebook friend who – wait, let me back up. I have a person who is a facebook “friend” – the quotes are necessary because this person isn’t my friend. I’m not really sure how I even connected with this guy, but I do know it was a long time ago, before I caught on to the fact that I don’t have to accept every friend request that comes my way. Anyway, this “friend” couldn’t be more different from me. I knew from his own status updates that he had very different views on just about every topic that is meaningful to me, but I never let it bother me because people are different – we don’t all have to be cookie-cutter mold of each other. I can appreciate – or maybe sometimes simply tolerate other people’s views as long as they aren’t hurting anyone. I appreciate that people tolerate mine – I know I am radically left compared to a lot of people I know. He can have his opinions, I can have mine, we can talk about the weather instead, and done.

Except suddenly I am seeing that some of his opinions aren’t simply different from mine – they are the exact opposite of everything I strive to be and teach my children. They are pure, unmitigated ignorance and hate.

I posted a link to a story about a speaker at a tea party gathering who responded to LGBT protesters by screaming “‘We Will Not Be Silenced By F***ots!’” and commented on how it’s hard to teach kindness and acceptance to children when adults say those kind of things. And then he pulled out an old favorite of the ignorant bigot and associated homosexuality with child molestation. And then my blood pressure shot up, blew the top of my head off, and got brains all over my office, the end.

OK, not really – instead, my blood pressure shot up, I got an instant headache, and I came here to vent.

Take a look at the comments in question (click to view a larger version):

I particularly like how the best thing he can come up with to insult me with is “bleeding heart liberal democrat.” I am a bleeding heart liberal democrat. I’m about as far left as you can get and I’ve never tried to hide that fact. And not only am I proud, I certainly don’t take offense when you call me that, regardless of whether you meant it as an insult. But not everyone who believes in kindness and acceptance of others is a bleeding heart liberal democrat and it’s an insult to them to assume as much.

And in 2012, I am damned sick and tired to this non-existent link between homosexuality and pedophilia. It’s bullshit and the only people who don’t know it seem to be this bigot and the members of the Westboro Baptist Church. But I think the part that pisses me off the most (and I see this a LOT when someone leaves a bigoted or otherwise ridiculous comment on someone’s opposing viewpoint) is the claim that I “introduced the subject.” I don’t know about you, but I am a little unclear on how I introduced the subject. I did introduce the subject of kindness and acceptance, but he brought the crazy.

And it IS crazy, to take a statement about kindness and turn it into this. You don’t have to know me from Adam, but I think it’s a pretty safe bet to assume that if I am talking about things like kindness and acceptance (especially in the context of a story about gay bashing) of people who are gay. Or a different race. Or a different religion. Or a million other things that do not include child molesters.

Because if it is true that I actually did leave it open by not specifically saying “acceptance of those who are not child molesters” then I clearly have a new hobby. And that hobby is responding to everything that people like him say with a question about child molesters. Kind of like this:

Bigot: Good morning.


Bigot: Merry Christmas!


Bigot: Welcome to Walmart!

See – fun!

Come on. If you want to debate a topic – fine. If you want to believe your hateful bullshit – fine (just keep it away from me), but don’t try pointing your tiny little finger back at me and telling me I asked for it. I imagine if you truly believe that, then “she asked for it” is a valid defense on a rape trial, too, isn’t it?

It’s pretty much a given that when people talk in broad strokes about kindness and acceptance and even basic tolerance, that there are some groups that they aren’t specifically including – child molesters being at the top of the list. I tend to assume (perhaps naively) that most people are not pro-molester, but that’s just me. Maybe it’s just the bleeding heart liberal democrat talking, but if it is, I wouldn’t want to be any other way.

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Swistle said...

I had to do Lamaze breathing to get through even a SUMMARY of the situation, and I didn't read his actual comments because I like the top of my head where it is and didn't want to spend tonight arguing with him in my head. It is actual PAINFUL (as well as ENRAGING) that it's even possible for people to think as he does.

Gina said...

It IS painful. I still have a headache hours later.

AM said...

Unfriend him...

Monica said...

Hank's profile picture looks like a sketch of Jeffrey Dahmer.

yea I couldn't understand where you go from homosexual tolerance to child molesters. And sorry if this offends but aren't Catholic Priests notorious for just that offense?

Wonder what ole Hank would have to say to that?

Monica said...

Oops I should clarify on that last comment! I didn't mean to generalize about all priests, just that there are a lot of them in the news for just that same offense.

Allison Says said...

Oh my god I love you, Gina.

I so feel your pain here. Glad it didn't end up going longer than that. THAT was painful enough.

bluzdude said...

That is how people argue when they know they can't win on merit (or logic.) They just throw inflammatory shit at the wall and wait for it to stick.

Leave it to you to come along with the giant scraper.

I'm with you on this 100%... but you knew that already, didn't you?

Gina said...

Monica - I knew what you meant - I don't think anyone would read that as a general statement about priests.

Gina said...

Actually, it's the police sketch of the unibomber. Speaks volumes, doesn't it?

Gina said...

Of course I knew that, you bleeding heart liberal democrat!

Logical Libby said...

You can hide him. I did with all of my "the poor should clean toilets" people.

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